Two weeks ago i sat in church for a wedding and next to me sat this 10 year old little girl. And when it was time for the couple to recite their vows, she knew these line word by word and i was compelled to ask her if she had an idea what they mean but her answer got was “I have been to weddings since i was six years old and its the same thing they say and because they are overly done they stick to yo head just like that”.
i realized i knew these vows myself when i looked back into my order of service. So i ask, what is in a church vow? this is what most African couples would go for because the church vow is only inside your head like how students cram the periodic table in chemistry but have never cared to understand it. These words are not glued on our hearts therefore we make no meaning out of them. as i interacted with few people i asked one married man why he choose to use church vows as opposed to his own and this is what he said “no one will hold me accountable if i mess them up because i only said what i was told to say”
A lot is in a church vow given the fact that by the time you decide on marriage then you are ready to stay with your partner throughout the rains and when the sun comes out your still together. However its not compulsory to recite church vows, you can always come up with your own vows that mean something to you for this is a promise that will not simply hold both of you together forever but keep you two together. therefore i really believe vows hold more than most people think.