Do not Rush when You go into the presence of the lord to speak!
She found me kneeling before my dressing mirror and tears were rolling out of my eyes. She stood there till i was finished and she said “My daughter is all well?”. Yes, i was just praying. ‘eh! it must be a heavy issue you are praying about’. She smirked and closed the door behind her.
I sat down at my floor also wondering what had changed about me. I do not recall making any utterance that night but deep within i was praying and tears just kept rolling down my cheeks. But all i recall is that i went into his presence expectant and that’s how it has been since. Everyday i am expectant. It changed from asking and having the same request repeated in his presence to asking and sitting back or thanking him even before i saw my request in my palms. I didn’t understand the scriptures so deep but i knew if i asked for bread i wouldn’t get stones, and repeating the same request wasn’t going to make my timing better than his. I believed by the time i meditated upon something or thought of it he was doing the same and it wasn’t just happening but he had planned that in that period it comes to mind.
I wasn’t speaking in tongues yet, or even thought of it but my silent prayer alone was a tongue. I recall the day i was to under go an apenddicectomy, the surgeons wanted to admit me a night before and i rejected and i was at the hospital by 6Am on the D-day. While my mother stood in the hallway and prayed as i was rolled away into the theatre, my head was black and the shortest prayer i ever made in my life was that morning. With half body Anathesia, i could speak so i closed my eyes in confindence and whispered “Into your hands lord, i commit myself.” I went in and work was done. I kept talking to the surgeons as they asked and i actually was in shock that the night before i was not worried even though i had been the past weeks and the words i kept repeating that night were ‘Lord, i can not die, not as yet’. My surgeon thought i was the most relaxed patient she had ever had. At exactly 1hr and 45mins i was out (and then some people wonder why i am so in love with Christ). My mother was on her knees thanking again (her knees have actually seen more ground than my feet.) She had just been through the same a month before when my father was undergoing an operation. That day i was frail, i went all the way to Mukono to seek a quite place in the chapel to ask God to strengthen me and lead us through, my brother was in the hospital corridor drowning in prayer then he delayed according to estimated time (jeez my faith was withering). But, that man is faithful.
Well, My prayer line and code changed. Something the Spirit taught me. It was deep, each time i went into his presence i would feel exactly that. Not like before when i prayed because mummy said so or i was sick or so happy. I prayed. i Found a peace even when i was angry i prayed, stuck, tired, happy, challenged, bored,i just prayed. If it is a drug i will say I am addicted. But this became a lifestyle. Even as i walked in my heart, i would meditate. (I love on this man because the way he covered me with his love, hmm). Sometimes i am lazy or too tired and then i tell myself, ‘Just say thank you’ but soon as i start, something moves me for more. All the changes in my life stayed with me because i didn’t think i would be understood so i asked a Friend of mine called Brenda about fellowship, and she invited me to School of fire a fellowship she attended. Something else changed. When God wants you somewhere, it doesn’t matter how long it will take but if he must make you uncomfortable, he does. I didn’t understand certain things about my life but we just rolled since i had no spiritual father ( i had no clue they existed though) and my Reverends thought i was just another rebellious person so i simply lived. The Dreams started!