Tag: Humanity

HOW DO YOU SEE LOVE?

How I see love

I watch it like I watch the sunset from top of a hill

I could stay up whole evening

I see it when I stare back into eyes

In my husband’s touch I feel it

I see it when people hold hands

And smile and hug,

I feel it in speech. When they don’t just say “I love you”

Or “I care for you” but also in the affection and action

I hear it in music, in every slow song, RnB & country lyric

In every saxophone played and every guitar strummed

Inside jokes and thoughtful gestures

I see it at restaurants when a plate of fries is shared

And a glass of white wine is twirled

I watch it in movies and read about it in every novel at my hand

I feel it in the innocence of children and their little warm hugs

I see love in matching outfits and poses taken during photos sessions,
in shy smiles, strong feelings, and acceptance of flaws.
I See Love……from my heart in my Ink

One heart, many songs

Queen of my heart

I don’t know which was queen that westlife meant but heart and queen in same sentence was just too poetic…too lyrical. The yellow and black. The foolish mic…. that looked hot by the way. The smile….jeez…let’s melt away. The green writing paper pads tucked away in my school bag

And if anything ever beat this, it could have been breathless.

Shayne wade just had my mind at heart while he wrote lyric by word by jam. The eyes were indeed mine and the babies are still mine but then that red dress and that dance couldn’t just sit down otherwise the mind would be jamming to kyomisinga

Eddie kenzo that boy…how exactly did you come up with these lines because. I was only not mature in love but also I just wanted to be a soul provider but with a fighter each time someone winked uselessly. I mean I was a queen and even when I was breathless I stayed alive because I was loved by the best at all times. I must have done something write…sorry right.

I have been loved by the best...Don Williams, you must have see him before the song was written. Because from him the love flows. And he calls me beautiful like it was my name. He picked me up every evening, turned on the radio and each day at 7am and pm,it was “Good morning beautiful”.

Steve holy, I wasn’t anything close to beautiful every morning but then, when you are a breathless queen being loved right and by the best, the favor and words come to you like a magnet…

It was very magnetic until the radio stopped playing and the electric dances became slow dances because the only promise came with a soul provider...

Romain Virgo must have know that my radio had no electricity and knew exactly where my heart found solace and my soul thirst. He gave me a soul provider to replace the lost soul and we started talking about love and trust and forever…

This is me

I wore my first pair of cool trousers at 13. (Maybe earlier) but that time flares were trending My sister in law bought me a flared black. I wore it with a company shirt of where my brother worked. ( I was a moving billboard). I was going to attend a school party. I loved the trousers but also I have big upper arms so I hardly wore spaghetti tops or tank tops. I always wore a sweater or sleeves. Well, I have plenty brothers so, those were plenty.

I adopted buggy clothes later on because I was a tomboy (maybe I still bounce even as a mom and wife). I feared the attention my body drew. See, adolescence gave my hips mass. My hips grew wide and my waist cringed and my chest wasn’t as full. Let’s say it’s what they call a pear shape. I got very comfortable, because that way I didn’t take compliments I didn’t know how to deal with. Then, one day I join a single sex school. My mom insisted I carry girly outfits so I had all the body hugging outfits that hugged the right places. In an all girls school, I didn’t expect attention like it would be with opposite sex. I was wrong. I attracted all kinds of attention, I got advances. Talked to my mom and before it was long, I was accused of being lesbian. I moved schools. Wearing makeup has never been my thing but once in a full moon I glam up. I didn’t wear body hugging things till campus ever again. But till this day, I don’t know how to respond to compliments about my body.

I love buggy

Sometimes I just want to dress up, glam up and show up.

But the younger me, was not made comfortable. Like my curves were an issue.

Buggy might no have done much but saved me a bunch.

Today I saw a young girl, about thirteen years of age. She wore a crop top and hot pants. She was adoloscenting. A male vendor shouted at her mom “give your daughter to me for marriage”. She had curves in the right places. Just like I was. But unlike me, she was comfortable dressing her body in whichever way she pleases or her parents are very okay with the way she dresses

Well, we ain’t defined by our clothes.

But I feared for her. I feared all the compliments and words that would be thrown at her. I fear of the things she will be accused of. I fear that she won’t be able to take it.

But maybe, just like me she will strike a balance. Dress for herself on many days and for comfort on others or for the public.

I have big legs but once someone tried to convince me I had elephantiasis. I didn’t show them off often, because I was comfortable covering up. Then my mom told me about my legs….. for whatever chance now, I show off.

Hi , I am Sharon. I will not apologize for God being a perfect sculptor.

nations 10

So today I went in for the usual check and the pressure was too high so they retained me. I don’t even know why it’s up hmm..way up. I have to be admitted for a night so that they can monitor it and if all goes well, we go home or it goes bad and we go for the options that i don’t exactly want to think about.

I lay down here with Kaka (God bless mothers) and My dad on phone calling every hour and Papa seated out waiting. Medication is being given but I am very hopeful we will go home. i like how calm and active you are in Thea. Don’t give up on me, because i am determined to carry this sheaf of grain till proper harvest. I have called Dr Apollo and he says the same for other options but here we are. God knows our hearts…Kemmy came by and told us to drink Hehe so we are going to drink..

10am next day

The pressure is stable (thank God) we are going home. Am not sure I will forget the screaming of all those ladies in labor, i pray we don’t get screaming too *hides face* My Champion, dear nations, we are going home. Papa is worried so we will go to Kaka till harvest.

4/10/2018

#PuzzledLines

I sit here with stones in my chest

filling up space where hope used to lie

looking at life and wondering

what is self love

what is selfishness

what is love even

Love?

that thing that i aborted from the chambers of my heart

that feeling that i don’t want to feel again

i get goosed up each time a man makes a pass

or even innocently …(no, nothing is innocent about men)

genuinely…(i don’t think the word works)

but that point when they seem to actually feel

But he did show all that Until my 10th birthday

When he sneaked into my room

wearing his white tunic and his grey beard almost glowing

Now,

I sit here with stones in my chest

filling up space where hope used to lie

continuously trying to convince people am good enough

or am lovable

They say love is effortless

it comes naturally

but how effortless

how do you find beauty in the broken

a kind of broken that only finds love in a wine bottle

and hope in a glass of tequila?

22b54c9af282e34029ade8cf1e5889a4

His scent….

I don’t know where he has been

What he has been doing

better still what he has endured for the day

His face covered in pimple sweat drops

His pleated sleeves neatly folded to his elbows

Smartly ironed trousers

But his scent……

He wore no cologne

Didn’t smell sweet either

He smelled like a tire

Or let’s say, a mixture of tire, sweat and bad deodorant

Gave him a scent similar to that of a he-goat

Do his women find his scent sexy?

Do sportsmen smell like this and still distribute hugs

Is this a scent of hustle

But like I said

I don’t know where he has been or he is going to?

I don’t even know half the things on his mind

Growing up can tire sometimes

Maybe sometimes this scent is allowed

Especially when not sweating on someone before taking a birth

Taxi tales

I see him almost every other time that i take a taxi after work. Clad in his Kaunda shirt, his beard greying and unkempt. His eyes, his eyes….He clenches his green hankie in his right hand and pockets his left firmly into the front pockets of his Kaunda. He usually sits right next to the conductor even if the taxi was empty when he got in.

Thoughts in my head “he is old, he should be home resting while his kids take care of him or probably doing something that wont have him moving“. Once i was lost in thought when i saw another man probably in his late 60s. He looked famished and worn out, he was slouching but he was slashing outside an office. my heart sunk, my mind wondered again.

I saw the old man yesterday morning, around 7am. I am not sure if it was his son or grandson, he was in company of a young boy who looked slightly like him. The young boy who was wearing an old uniform and canvas without socks held his hand and led him to the Taxi and waited till he sat. At his usual sit, wearing his usual clothes. I found out this day that he was blind, i prefer to say visually impaired. At first i always thought he had squints but today i found out he wasn’t. His left hand was also impaired and in his pocket he was tightly holding unto 5000shs that he was using as taxi fare (guessing he holds it so he doesn’t have to be cheated by people he cant trust to tell him what exact note he is holding). I wanted to know his story, i was dying to see who picks him up when he gets to his stop, i wanted to be able to help maybe share my 1000shs with him. But i was at the back, i couldn’t even whisper to him and i got off before he did.

i hope i see him again, i hope i can have a cup of tea with him but i am afraid he might never want to sit down for tea with a stranger.

WRITING

Sipping my tea at a cafe
I saw them,

holding hands and laughing as they sipped on their smoothies
i felt them,

warm and watery. The tears ran on my rounded cheeks onto my cup.

I sniffed.
You were the poison

And yet I kept drinking from your cup.

I could have broken under the weight of my past,

trying to rectify and please
maybe question and sulk.

I don’t even know why i kept coming back but i guess it was revision not to repeat the same mistake twice.

Your mess was a qualification for my love.
I let my love pull down the strongholds of those memories and silence the accusing voices and i loved HIM

gave him my heart like it hadn’t been hurt before
gave him my soul like it was a lollipop,
i let him take total control
i wasn’t worried about another mess,
it was only one heart and i was positive it would heal
yet still, i had high hopes in HIM
since then, its been handled like a fine piece of glass,

an accolade
and i am at rest

7738e25fec88683f8664b17007bd6cb8

Nations 8

12/5/18

I would like that you know the things I love. Life should never be as complicated as the world paints it.

Today I will tell you about my grandma. Your great grandma at that. She is late and maybe I didn’t realize how much I had grown so attached to her until she took her last breath. I love very many people with time you will know.

Mukya, I called her. We shared many things. When I went to the village my grandpa (lord bless his soul) would leave his bed for us. I did love him but maybe God took him before I got to understand him or spend so much time with him. I didn’t frequent the village because the environment change didn’t favor my health a lot and I am my dad’s little wallet. Well, when mukya came to Kampala, we shared a bedroom. Our mornings began with a sleepy long prayer that would wake you if you hoped to continue after and they ended with a prayer that got you dosing but made sure the Amen was heard. Our days were full of hymns in Runyankole. She spoke English only she and I understood. We sang rock of ages till the words stung deep, called Yesu until he said here I am, complained of pain and naked women in music videos, questioned why almost every tv soap had crying women but most of the day we were thankful. Oh yes, we were very thankful that I forgot how to ask God for certain things and be thankful for every small thing because every day was a blessing. We talked about boys and makeup and made jokes about ministers wives because she was one. Oh, she hated lazy everything with her whole life. She liked to work that even in pain she grabbed a hoe. I don’t know how to dig but I promise to pass on everything I learned. (God as my strength)

Am not perfect. Everyday I will fall short even as your mom. But I promise to be on your Team always.

Nations -2

Dear nations

As long as mummy has air(never take it for granted so when pride kicks in, remember who lendest you breath)

I was saying, as long as mummy has breath, hold unto these hands mahogany…i however can’t wait to tell you about whose hands hold us all.

I won’t promise to stop the storm for you, but will always try protect your eyes from the dust( for your eyes are far more precious than diamonds) and be your wind breaker

Always keep the stars in your eyes and dreams in your heart. Jeremiah was sent to prophecy to nations….you are Nations

 

3/3/2018